You, my little rock star, are a gift. You are a gift to me, you are a gift to your family, and a gift to everyone you encounter. Being a girl is really hard. It straight up just sucks sometimes, let’s be honest. So I wanted to share with you philosophies that I try to live by that I think could really help you navigate this complicated world.
- “Life is too short to stress yourself with people who don’t deserve to be an issue in your life”
So I found this little gem when I was a sophomore in high school and some people could really get me down. I think I’ve always gone back to this when dealing with those that, no matter what you do, will just not be your biggest fan. But it’s okay because I will be. And then I’ll give some serious side eye to them for you whenever I see them.
- All you can possibly do is be you, whatever that is.
One of the greatest beauties in life is that you are constantly evolving as a person. At times it can be really difficult to know yourself. You will struggle with your identity and what you stand for on numerous occasions. But then when you figure it all out, it really just boils down to the fact that being you is perfectly enough and I will be anxiously awaiting to watch you grow.
- Surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you.
If you are as lucky as I was, you will find a group of friends that make you the best possible version of yourself each and every day. This is key, little one. Find someone that challenges you, someone that makes you laugh, someone to just go crazy with, and someone to be there to help you pick up the pieces. (And then maybe you’ll realize that I’m still cool and can be all of the above but I won’t push my luck yet.)
- Trust the timing of your life.
It may seem a bit cheesy but it’s true. Some things will happen and you will wonder, “Why now? Why me?” eventually you will look back and it will all make sense. I will tell you that and you will think I’m crazy but then I will swell with pride when one day you wake up and allow it to change you for the better.
- You are more than the choices that you make.
You are going to make mistakes. If you’re anything like your mother, you are going to make a lot of them. And that is totally okay. Being perfect is one hundred percent overrated. The choices you make can teach you some of the best lessons, give you some of the best memories, or even give you some really great cries. No matter what you do, I will always be your number one supporter and therapist when need be.
- Don’t be afraid to have different opinions.
You don’t have to have the same thoughts on everything as those around you. Sometimes being different can lead to learning the most out of everyday life. You don’t always have to agree with me either. I will always respect you and admire you for your strength in being who you are.
- Be somebody who makes everybody feel like a somebody.
There is such great joy in bringing happiness to others. When you choose happiness yourself, it is simply not possible not to rub off on those around you. Say hi to that shy girl at school. Talk to the homeless man on the street. Make conversation in the elevator. It will bring a smile to my face in so many more ways than you know.
- It’s okay to cry.
I still continue to struggle with this concept. Even trying to see the best in every situation can still leave you with a hole in your heart. You will cry over mean girls and I will sit at your bedside and hold you. You will cry over stress and I will help you at whatever cost. You will cry because you won’t think you are good enough and I will be there to assure you that you are. And most of all, you will cry over boys. I will make them question their entire existence.
- Choose significance in your life over success in it.
Some of the best leaders are the ones who go unnoticed. The quiet ones. The ones who seek no recognition for anything they do. Their joy comes from being a good person. Making an impact on other people. You can learn so much from these kinds of people. You learn to know what you’re best at, what bring a light to your eye, and how you can in turn share that light with those around you. You learn how to excel instead of compete. No one has to lose for you to win
My precious girl, I can promise you all of these things and more for one very special reason; these are all of the things your grandmother has taught me. She is one of the most amazing women I have had the privilege of knowing. You can learn more from her than you would ever think imaginable. I hope to be half the mother to you as she was to me.
All my love, Mom